I have finally opened my Ninja Guild, and inducted it’s first 2 members…my nephews. Ahhhhh the joys of getting them jacked up on skittles and cupcakes and watching them beat the living crap out of each other. Then being able disappear (in a very ninja-like manner) leaving 2 non-ninja’s to fend them off. It is an awesome power, some simply call it being a uncle, fools (hahahahha).
In Celebration, I am posting the first of many “Ask a Ninja Episodes”……while wearing a full ninja suit…..remember young ninjas….it’s not a costume….
Watch and learn young ninjalings! (They are very lucky I’m not teaching them grammar, ninja’s abhor grammar)
Everyone knows, never use a 9mm, hell he could have been in an Apache helicopter firing hell fire missiles. If he had any sense in his thick skull he would have just done a little research. It’s not as fast as a hand gun, but here is the proper way to do nasty things to a unicorn unicorn.
Now the secret is out. What cargo did Han lose that pissed Jabba off so much that he had him frozen in carbonite. Well the students at daveschool.com have not only got the answer, but have created an incredibly professional animation to answer that question for you.
Get ready for a visual treat, as well as a good laugh.
A new study has found that weekends are actually good for you, and necessary in order to maintain good health. So, as it turns out, slacking is a food group, and must be consumed on a regular basis……Nice!
Weekends are good for you….not getting liquored up, eating a box of doughnuts and shagging mutltipule partners while driving down the turnpike watching TV and smoking a cigarette, as this other article will explain that just about anything there is worth doing on the weekend will kill you.
Philip K Dick had no Idea there would be such a tournament held in his dystopian future…but as far as the Art Dept making this movie are concerned, it happened right downtown….explains the robot fairy, and robot-ninja’s though….and the fighting pile of logs.
Here’s the thing, I’m a big fan of Tekken, but these movie adapations almost always tend to suck, major. I am intrigued, but will most likely see when it goes straight to DVD.
Hell, I can’t figure out what the hell is going on when I watch the cut-scene movies in the game, never the less watch a whole 2 hours of a convoluted story line.
I like robot-ninjas and boxing kangaroos as much as the next guy, but I’m no Otaku.
Now, having a Tekken battle with friends at my pad before viewing the movie on DVD, that’s a good time just waiting to happen……
The Personal Soundtrack Shirt started as an April Fools’ joke by ThinkGeek, but now it’s available for you to purchase.
You know it’s true, the soundtrack to your life is always ringing in your ears, well not it doesn’t have to be all in your head. Give yourself a Royal entrance, or let your lady know you mean business with the “Sexy Time” theme when you enter the bedroom.
Not only does this shirt play theme songs, it also has sound effects, rim shots, laugh tracks, drum rolls, the whole nine yards!
As if that wasn’t enough the whole thing is controlled by a remote, so you can trigger them at your will.
A cooler shirt may be available in some interconnecting multi-verese, but I really doubt it.
Included Musical Themes
Royal Entrance
Sexy Time Theme
Disco Floor
Silent Movie Chase Theme
True Love
Scary Movie
Spy Mission
Super Hero Rescue
Western Showdown
Game Show
Included Sound Effects
Cheering
Drum Roll
Cat Call Whistle
Laugh Track
Booing
Crying
“Wrong Answer” Buzzer
Rim Shot
Metal Air Guitar
Police Siren
Usually I could care less about carrying an umbrella, what’s a little water. But umbrellas like these bring back the fun. These things are to umbrellas what crazy straws were to a glasses of milk. I now look forward to rain….just so I can whip out my sword, and fend off the offending rain drops. If the occasion warrants it, such as inclement weather while the sun is not available, I can just flick on my LED Blade Runner Umbrella, and wander the streets of China Town in style…..
Samurai Sword Umbrella
Defeat the rain with Honor!
The rain will quake in fear as you reach for you kick-ass Samurai Sword Umbrella. Check this puppy out, the handle is styled after Samurai Sword handle, and hell it’s even balanced pretty well. The nylon sheath even comes with an adjustable shoulder strap. This thing really kicks ass.
You know you want this…Relive the dystopian future of Blade Runner whenever there is inclement weather. The LED handle lights up, and is actually useful in the dark, making it easier to spot replicants.
And remember….All these things will be lost in time…..like tears….in rain.
